The Great Dilemma

    Our prayer time for prodigals was different this week, for one thing we met in person for the first time in months, but the main reason for that was so we could discuss concerns some of our women had in response to Sunday's sermon from Hebrews 10. The final verses of the chapter are about the seriousness of the judgment for those who turn away from what Christ has offered. When one asked our pastor to harmonize this scripture with the story of the prodigal son, he was not very helpful. Our pastor's sons are young, it is easy for him to tell parents of prodigals that lack of fruit indicates their grown children are probably unsaved, while his own are young and responsive. His understanding will be deepened if the sons he leads to Christ as boys, stray later in life. What I think the women wanted to discuss was the great dilemma--Should I warn my adult prodigals of the judgment to come at the risk of severing the relationship?

     Here are the things we considered:

   --The context of Hebrews.  What I finally understood this time through Hebrews was why it was written. Jews that had become Christians, now hated by both Rome and their fellow Jews, were considering going back to Judaism. For me this would be like forsaking Christ to go back to the empty elitism of the Mormon church, an incomprehensible idea. So, although judgment awaits those who wander and doubt, it is not the same thing as deliberately trading Christ's sacrifice for offerings that had nothing to offer, except less persecution.

  --Their Biblical background. Our prodigals grew up in Christian homes. They know about hell and judgment, even if they do not want to think about it. We don't like to think about it either. I had many years while my children were growing up to plant the seeds of God's truth in their hearts, but they are grown now and my role has changed. I must do the same thing Christ did when he left his disciples, trust the Holy Spirit to teach them how to apply what they learned. We should, however, have the opportunity to plant those seeds of faith in our grandchildren--if we don't alienate their parents. If a warning now would drive our prodigals closer to Christ, even if it drove them away from us, it would be worth the pain. Unfortunately, rejection tends to be a package deal, rejecting everything associated with Christ, not just their preachy parents. And then we lose the opportunity to be a godly influence to both our children and theirs. Not worth the risk.

  --The power of a godly life. In 1Peter 3:1, 2 wives are instructed to reach their unsaved husbands by behavior, not words. If that is true in the most open, intimate relationship we have on earth, why do we think grown children with whom we have much less intimacy will respond to our unsolicited Biblical "advice"? Oftentimes our words prove to them that we do not trust God to reach them without our "help".

 --The power of the Holy Spirit. I did not get saved because I loved what Christ had done for me, although I believed it to be true. I got saved because the Holy Spirit beat me to a pulp with the knowledge that I was lost and would go to hell if I died. Even then, it took a year to wear down my resistance, but inevitably, irresistibly, He won. Some claim God is too polite to intrude where He is unwanted, Paul and I would disagree. I pray that the same power that knocked Paul off and on his ass, will convict my loved ones. And although I would love to be everyone's amateur Holy Spirit, because I have so many ideas about what other people should be doing, the actual Spirit is really good at his job and far more effective than my words. He even speaks "men". Every Holy Spirit Jr. I have observed (including me) in my 48 years as a Christian, has pushed people farther from God, not closer. 

 

   So the long trip to my short answer is, no. It is not worth severing an already stressed relationship with her 40 something prodigal, to remind her what she already knows about God's judgment. And no, I do not think losing the opportunity to be a godly influence to her grandchildren, by alienating a son well taught in Biblical truth, is worth the risk. What they choose to do is between them and God, but I hope the decision is based on faith, not fear. My BSF study has been about Jacob, who spent decades drifting in and out of God's will, yet the Lord Himself chose to be identified as the God of Jacob. With repeated patience, God faithfully set him on the right path again, without his mama's words, without a Bible, without even the influence of other believers. Our great dilemmas always come down to the same thing--trusting God to do what we cannot.