Oh Bleep!

     I have been a Christian for a long time and seldom use even the minced oaths acceptable in Christian  circles, even when in traffic with sadists, or when the person ahead of me in the bank drive through is taking so long I can only assume it is their first time handling money, or the shopper I am behind at the checkstand wants to pay for their groceries with a two party, out-of-state check. Such are the foibles of human existence, not worth fussing about. So please insert an acceptable Christian word for the bleep. As I mentioned in my "Giving Up" blog, understanding who Jesus is is a very inconvenient truth. Unspiritual as it sounds, that can be an oh bleep moment. Spiritual warming requires complete reorientation of our lives and unlike one politician's "Inconvenient Truth", God's truth cannot be half baked.
     But my oh bleep times happen when God reveals some service He wants me to do for Him and I don't want to do it. Early in my Christian life I thought such decisions were up to me, so my primary considerations when asked to do something in my church or community were my natural abilities, schedule and comfort.  Then, through my Bible study, I learned God is not concerned about any of those things. He rarely calls us into areas of our natural ability because then we are less likely to depend on Him and, since God equips those He calls, our abilities are not needed. God also adjusts the schedules of those He calls so our current schedule is of no concern. I experienced this time expansion aspect of serving God often when I led a prayer group that I was sure I did not have time for. We are concerned with comfort, God is concerned with obedience. Obedience brings a joy more satisfying than comfort.
     One of my vivid oh bleep moments was when I was called into BSF leadership--for the third time. The first two times I was asked to pray about leadership, I survived unscathed. The third time I had barely begun praying when I could tell by the pounding of my heart and unwelcome certainty in my mind that I was supposed to say yes. Oh bleep! I was not a natural leader, not even an unnatural one. God did not care. The same thing happened when I was asked to speak at a ladies' retreat. I knew I was supposed to say yes despite having no idea, beyond a general topic, what I would say. God supplied all the ideas, I was not nervous and actually enjoyed the experience.
     I do not agree to serve God because I am spiritual, I obey because I have learned resistance is futile.  I am spiritual enough to know when God is calling me, but unspiritual enough for it to feel like the clammy hand of death has grabbed me. Getting an assignment from God feels less like being touched by an angel, than being tazered by the Spirit, a startling sensation that can make even a seasoned saint say "Oh bleep!"