Buffet Service

      One of the restaurants we patronize here in Wichita offers a buffet on weekends. But it does not seem like an offer, it sounds more like an order. Do you want the menu or THE BUFFET?!! In the case of the restaurant we went to Saturday, it was the tail end of buffet time and most of the food looked mummified. The wait staff are not looking out for our best interests, they are looking for theirs. If we order the buffet, the waitress will not have to actually wait on us, except when it is time for the tip.

     Hotel housekeeping has become like that. You don't really want us to clean your room, do you?! We are staying in this hotel for three weeks, they shouldn't even want us to go that long without service. It is warm and humid in Wichita, if we left the air conditioner off, we could grow pot in our room. It is also a pet friendly hotel, we could start a three week doggie day care. Room cleaning was one of the early casualties of Covid. Hotel staff were protecting us by staying out of the room. Now that most of the world realizes Covid is not the cosmic death ray we were warned about, social distancing and mask wearing are considered overkill. (See how cleverly I worded that.) 

     However, housekeeping has not recovered from Covid. When you check into a hotel, cleaning is offered as if it was a time share presentation. You don't really want this, do you? Maid service has become the self serve buffet of hotel amenities. Personally, I never refuse an offer of cleaning services. I wish it would happen at home. I bring no great gift, and certainly no enthusiasm, to the world of cleaning. Every hotel I have stayed in has a fancier method of making the bed than I do. It helps that I know a little Spanish, and Google knows the words I do not. For instance, I have just learned that the command form for the verb vacuum is, aspirare. I am hoping the maid will take that as an order, not an offer. I am not here for the buffet.