This Mother's Day

     I hesitate to post this poem before I have time to fix it up, but I think it is better to share it at the time it pertains to, Mother's Day, than to get the wording just right. Last year at this time I was just trying to keep moving through my days with some semblance of normality, despite the shock and loss, to just keep breathing. This year, with more distance from Tracy's death, I have words to express what I'm feeling. For good or bad, this is the real me.

            This Mother's Day

 

  This Mother's Day approaches with  

gratitude and remembrance--and sorrow.

The deepest desire of my heart,

my perpetual prayer, the one that mattered most

was for our family to be together in heaven forever.

God answered my prayer, my son is there.

 

  I am just as much a mother as I ever was

before my child went to heaven,

five minutes or fifty years, it makes no difference.

My earthly role as his mother has ended,

but the relationship is eternal.

We will always be a part of each other.

 

  So if this Mother's Day, my pleasure and thanks

mingle with memories and tears,

and sometimes silence, despite all

I know to be true about God and heaven,

it is only because of this other truth--

I am just as much a mother as ever.