I Should Have Bought a T-Shirt

    If I had known my souvenir of our trip to Oregon was going to be sciatica, I would have bought a T-shirt instead. This trip was our first experience using VRBO (Vacation Rental By Owner). The unit and view were exactly as advertised. The balcony overlooked Siletz Bay and a parking lot, but the parking lot was for a nice little park. The rooms were clean and comfortable. Except for the bed. I  am not a fan of memory foam mattresses. I like being cuddled at bedtime, but not by my mattress. From the first night there, the bed and I did not get along. The squishy foam put pressure on my bad shoulder or back, depending on position. After the third night, my shoulder conceded the competition in favor of my back. Then my back decided to share the pain with my hip and thigh. My calf got off easy with only numbness. Sciatica, the gift that keeps on giving.

    My gift decided, uninvited, not only to come back to Montana with me, but to share the same seat in the car. I was very glad we divided the return trip into two days. By the time we got to Kennewick Saturday night, I thought I might have to ride on the luggage cart to get up to our room. The hotel mattress was better than the condo, but not enough to put out the fire in my hip. The next morning, Reed took me to a nearby e.r. so I could get pain meds to survive the trip home. The doctor did not answer my repeated question if the meds would last for the six hour drive to Kalispell, but I found out the answer for myself. They wore off when we reached St. Regis. Still, that was easier than the travel the day before.

    My family physician was not available to see me Monday, so I took pot luck with another doctor from the practice. His diagnostic questions were the same as the e.r., any loss of bladder control, numbness. Fortunately, my bladder did not get invited to the pain party. I eventually realized there was numbness in my calf, but I did not notice that until after the cortisone shot relieved some of the pain in my hip. Not to be outdone, the pain displaced by my happier hip moved back to where it came from, my lumbar spine. Kind of like evicting an unwanted guest from the house only to find he's moved into the garage. The doctor, having cured me to his satisfaction, and finding the massive spasm in my thigh of minimal interest, sent me on my way with a prescription for five muscle relaxants and physical therapy. I was not interested in another round of a therapist counting repetitions of exercises I can easily do at home, but found a clinic close to my house that uses dry needling to reduce inflammation. Today was my second session. We'll see.

    I spent more than I should have on our trip for toys and candy souvenirs for my granddaughters. And I'm in the process of spending way more money--between an e.r. visit, doctor appointment, drugs and physical therapy--on my VRBO souvenir. In my case VRBO meant Vertebrae Rearranging Bed Option. But, if I had known I would have no choice about bringing a souvenir home from Oregon, I would have bought a T-shirt.