Is This Wisdom?

           Is This Wisdom?

 

Is this wisdom, I wonder, as I realize

I go deeper now when I read scripture

than I used to, despite decades of Bible study?

I asked for wisdom five years ago

when our son's life imploded

from alcoholism, legal troubles,

a disastrous marriage, debt, job losses

and all the other damage that accompanies addiction.

 

Our home became his sober living place

and we, reluctantly, his sober police.

I begged the Lord for the wisdom He promised,

so we would know how to help him

and when to let him fall.

 

Not just general principles of scripture,

specific guidance from God's Son for ours.  

Not polite prayers, but passionate pleas.

It was enough for me that He guided us 

through those days of desperation.

But now, enjoying the blessing of his sobriety,

his plans for the future, his regained independence,

I still find myself contemplating scripture more deeply than before,

the humanity of the people, the weight of what is written,

and what is not, the weaving of scripture with scripture.

And I realize now that perhaps the power to see more 

is the afterglow of the wisdom I prayed for.

It is so like God to give more than I asked.

The insight did not end when our son got sober

and the need for it was not so dire.

 

Still we wait for him to draw closer to God

because learning to wait for God's timing--

this is wisdom.