False Advertising

     Since my default drive is set to cheap, my idea of shopping is checking clearance racks.  I was doing this in Bozeman a couple weeks ago when I found a dress in a beautiful shade of blue.  I tried it on and it looked pretty good, but it was missing something--a waist.  What a coincidence, I am missing a waist also.  You would think a time called "middle age" would be more cooperative about whittling your middle.  Then I realized having a good figure at my age would be akin to false advertising.  From the back, my body would be writing checks my face couldn't cash.  Age is something better worn as a matching set.
     Along the same lines, I know a young woman subsisting on a deprivation diet because she is hoping to be picked up in the "Man Market".  This is wrong for several reasons, one being that she was not overweight to begin with, another that a man shopping for an emaciated woman is someone who she should pick on, not be picked up by.  The third reason is that unless she wants to stay on that deprivation diet the rest of her life, she is guilty of false advertising.  In this case, a weight-loss leader ad.  It's better to sit on the shelf than be stuck with a man who only shops in the health and beauty section.