Pyrrhic Victory

    The expression Pyrrhic victory is a reference to a king who had so many casualties defeating the Romans that his win was essentially a loss. That is what has comes to mind in the Covid 19 pandemic. That the actual losses were much lower than predicted is no surprise because we had little data to begin with. China has never been known for its candor. Likewise South Korea. The next data came from Italy which quickly became a hot spot, both because social distancing is not the Italian way and socialized medicine is not an effective means. Expecting the worst, America closed businesses, schools, arenas and churches. Everyone was sent home for healthy behavior. But as the weeks have gone by, except for hot spots in a few bigger cities, the actual rate of spread and death is drastically lower than the computer models predicted. Computer models are only as accurate as the data input and the data was skewed. But instead of saying, "We were wrong", our leaders are saying, "Staying home worked". But it doesn't work unless Americans can get back to work.
     If the actual number of infected matched the predictions, most people would, even now, be hunkered at home. But they have not, and the natives are getting restless. Our hospital, like many others, emptied itself for the influx of Covid patients--which did not happen. Most of the infected are sent home to quarantine. Meanwhile the empty hospital has furloughed 600 employees, and nurses like my son and his wife keep having their shifts cancelled. KRMC has lost $16 million from the shut down and probably (privacy precludes finding out) had less than five Covid patients. Some union nurses even stood on the hospital lawn holding signs about personal protective equipment shortages which, they admitted, has not been a problem here, because you only need PPE if you have patients. My church even prepared a basket of snacks--granola bars, tea bags, gum, etc. for hospital workers on the front lines, as if they were pulling double shifts of hazardous duty. I declined to participate. What our nurses need most right now are paying shifts. Then they can earn money to buy their own granola bars. For the sake of treating Covid, we are bankrupting the treatment facilities for that and any other medical problem.
     Killing the economy and shutting our hospitals to defeat this virus is a Pyrrhic victory. Instead of flattening the curve, we are digging a Depression.    

Covid, Covid, Covid

     In times of stress, I sometimes ask God what He would say to me and, in the last few years, He has been kind enough to answer. Not verbally, of course, that would scare me to death. Just words, impressed in my mind. Mostly encouragements. And, even those, I fact check to make sure they agree with God's Word, because are not objective about God's leading no matter how much we try. And God does not always choose to answer. He did not when my father-in-law was dying. But Wednesday I was talking to the Lord about Corona virus, that I know that He is sovereign, but He knows our rulers are idiots. Unexpectedly, I heard, "I am sovereign over idiots." Definitely Biblical. I hadn't felt particularly stressed by the Covid restrictions and I had not asked for a message from the Lord, but there it was, and it was encouraging. So much so that I composed a little Covid song to the tune of the "Rawhide" theme.

 Covid Covid Covid

My brain's overloaded.

You would think we're all going

to die.

Your life might be in danger

if you touch a stranger

unless you're masked and gloved

don't even try.

Hoarding is an issue

can't find toilet tissue

or flour, but no one 

knows why.

Can't go get a haircut.

Eating out means take out.

Drive thrus are the best way

to buy.

We might just go ballistic

from scary statistics.

Their numbers have all been

much too high.

Wash your hands!

Stay at home!

Sanitize your cart!

Keep 6 feet apart 

or die!

Wear a mask!

Put on gloves!

Follow all the rules!

Til we live like we did.

Covid.

 

Homecoming

This time things did not go back to normal
after my father-in-law's homegoing,
not for the bereaved, not for anyone.
His memorial service was practically
the last of it's kind,where family gathers,
the church is full, and hugging is safe.

Delmar went home to heaven
and the rest of us were sent home
for safekeeping. Not for sports,or concerts,
or holidays, or family events,
not to celebrate and not to mourn.
But for shelter. Homecoming.

I do not know God's purpose in this,
when things will go back to normal
or if they even should. We have been
such busy people. Now that we have
time to listen, both God and man call us
to come home.

Baby Kids

My granddaughter, Brie, is not yet three

 she will not remember the pandemic,
or how life around the world
changed in a matter of weeks.

She doesn't understand why
she can't go to the park
or restaurant play areas.
She misses kids her own age.

She calls them "baby kids".
I am not sad to shelter at home
it is a refuge dearer to me
than anyplace on Earth

----

We want for nothing here at home
there's little that I miss
I still can fill my time alone
my one regret is this--

Brie cannot do the things she did
when life was safe for baby kids.

 

What Flourishes Besides Germs

     
There are many things that flourish besides germs during a pandemic:

Hoarding. When people found out they might be stuck at home for weeks, someone decided the main thing they would need to treat a respiratory virus at home was toilet paper. The idea caught on like selfies and soon there was no tissue to be found on store shelves. The same for bottled water even though water systems are not usually susceptible to colds. There was a run on canned goods, taco shells and an assortment of other random foods. Garlic bulbs were as hard to find as the vampire invasion some were apparently expecting. The hoarding of hand sanitizer, disinfectant and cleaning supplies was rude, but at least made sense.

Scalpers. Whenever there is a shortage, real, imaginary or, in Covid's case, cretin created, there are people who reach out to rip off their fellow man. Some are shameless enough to post their greed on Craig's list. A manager at Albertsons told my dad a man took the last package of toilet tissue from the shelf, then offered it to the couple behind him for $25. When the employee told him he couldn't sell what he hadn't even paid for, the man, knowing store policy didn't allow detainment, said "You can't stop me." I wish I had been there to record his trashy transaction on my phone. I could have made him famous on Facebook, after all, he couldn't stop me. But slime balls associate with other slime balls and I wouldn't have been surprised if karma caught up with him before he even left the parking lot.

Scams.  Americans had hardly settled into their shelters before scams sprang up. Special, overpriced sanitizers. Virus killing air purifiers. Fake websites collecting donations. And even though they are probably legitimate, I refuse to tack a donation on my total at grocery check stands when no one can tell me who collects the money and who it is given to.

Spam.  Suddenly, I was getting emails for oxygen units and air purifiers along with the usual male enhancement and cannabis ads.

Snitches. These are the same people who were tattle tales in grade school. The kids who reported who was praying with their eyes open in Sunday school. The gossipy coworker. They like rules and they like reporting people who are not following the rules even better. Pandemic protocols are the perfect opportunity for snitches to exercise their gift of gossip.

Conspiracies.  Never ones to waste a good crisis, conspiracy theorists claim that Corona Virus was created by ___________, is a cover up for ___________, or is of benefit to ___________.  I have to admire their persistence, it's not easy to find ways a worldwide pandemic benefits one group over another. Depending on politics, Democrats spread Covid 19 to make President Trump look bad or Republicans did it to ensure Trump a second term. Some see this as the government's plot to take over the nation's businesses--mini-marts? T shirt shops? music stores? Really? Or there's the theory that the real reason Germany is testing large portions of their populace for Covid 19 is to secretly obtain and register their DNA. The German government must have more employees, resources, organization, better computers, and less snoopy reporters than the U.S. because our bloated, blundering, blabbing bureaucracy could never pull it off.

Acts of kindness. Covid 19 is most dangerous to those with underlying health problems. Similarly, the crisis surrounding the pandemic reveals the underlying health of the hearts of individuals. The Bible says our words and actions come from the thoughts and intents of our hearts. Corona virus did not make hoarders become selfish or scalpers become greedy, it just provided opportunities for those traits to surface. Those very same circumstances are also inspiring acts of kindness, sacrifice and generosity in others. If only those things could flourish until they become pandemic.

I Can Work With That

    My granddaughter has been fighting naps for a while now. When she was smaller I would put her in the playpen at nap time on Grandma day, give her a blankie, snack and sippy cups, a book and a toy and let her fuss herself to sleep. As she grew, there was no room for the book and toys. Then she got tall enough to climb out of the playpen. Nap time was ruined. I tried lying down with her in the big bed near the playpen, but it was like resting with a kangaroo--boing, boing, boing. So now I don't even try to put her down for a nap unless she seems moderate to severely comatose. But on the last two Grandma days, Brie has looked ready to drop off to dreamland with just a little push. Crying is a natural opening act for a nap and, being a toddler, Brie injures herself on a regular basis. Not that I want her to get hurt, but if she hurts herself, I can work with that.
    Two weeks ago she attempted to carry a DVD down to the basement balanced on her thumb. She was so focused on that, she wound up rolling down most of the steps all the way to the landing. They are carpeted and she wasn't hurt, but she was upset and crying and I thought, I can work with that. So I laid her on the downstairs sofa, covered her with a blanket, and dimmed the lights. It wasn't immediately successful, but eventually she was ready to be put in the playpen and took a two hour nap.
    Last Grandma day, she looked tired while riding her little car in our driveway. The car tipped over and again she wasn't hurt, just crying. Another I can work with that opportunity. I walked her back into the house and this time she climbed in the playpen herself and asked for her blankie. That was a much shorter nap due to all the juice she drank that morning, but it was enough to reset her attitude.
    I think that is also how God works with us. He doesn't want us to get hurt and He doesn't need to hurt us, we do that to ourselves. But He uses those opportunities to get us where we need to be, to reset our attitude. Grownups also stumble, in ways less physical but much more shameful than toddlers. It is good to know that when, not if, we stumble God can work with that.

Handywoman's Corner

    We are big fans of the Red Green Show, a comedy about redneck Canadian members of the fictional Possum Lodge. It was the only program we watched on PBS, and it has been out of production so long, PBS no longer airs it. However, they still show Lawrence Welk and he died before the Red Green Show began, but it would no doubt cause rioting in nursing homes across America if it wasn't on TV. One of the segments every week was called Handyman's Corner, where Red would take worthless items found in the home, yard or, even better, a neighbor's yard, and using the handyman's secret weapon, duct tape, Red would construct something even more worthless than the original components. For instance, he made a home intercom system using old toilets and drainpipe, or used an empty aquarium and really poor installation skills to put a sunroof in a car. Not his own car.  The segment always closed with "If the women don't find you handsome, they should at least find you handy."

     Handyman's Corner was the inspiration for my recent Facebook post about using a bra as a face mask for pandemic protection. Because Facebook posts are generally brief, there was not room to expand, which is important when considering bras. So I will put my full figured brain child here. The beauty of the bra face mask is that most women have at least a couple old bras lying around. There are two reasons for this: 1)  Limbo (not limp) bras--the ones that are too worn to wear, but too good to throw out. 2) Experimental bras-- the ones we buy hoping they will fit better than our old stand by, in my case Playtex 18 hour industrial support. When they inevitably let us down, in my case literally, we stuff our bra--in the back of the underwear drawer. The bra I used for my face mask was a D cup, but that is a little excessive, my boob is bigger than my lower face, for which my face is, and any onlookers probably are, thankful. A C cup would fit better, and a B cup would probably work but, if you wear size A, there is more danger of suffocation than Corona virus.
     The next step in making the bra mask is deciding if you want to save both cups or just one. Even though it leaves only one strap to go over your ear, I chose to err on the side of caution and leave both cups intact, in case I need an emergency back-cup. However, the advantage of having just one cup is that you can use the band as a strap to go over your other ear, which will make the mask fit nicer and remove a lot of the bulk where the bra will be tied in the back. Tying a bra behind your head is tricky, but not as difficult as hooking one behind your back, the normal way. Frankly, people gawking at the unsightly knot behind your head is the least of your problems when wearing a bra mask, the expressions of the people you can see are the problem. You can only hope shoppers behind you aren't calling to report a loose mental patient, and that you bring a smile to their lips. But you won't be able to see that, because they are wearing masks.
     Also an advantage is that, if you forget your mask at home, all it takes is a few moments of privacy to rectify the problem, although going bra-less, at my age and weight, is a problem in itself. Another bonus is that social distancing won't be an issue because people will want to stay a minimum of six feet away from you. These are crazy times we live in, we might as well look the part. Remember, "if you can't spread germs, you can at least spread joy."