Lecture Detector

     I am looking forward to many teachable moments with my grandchildren as they get older, times when they ask questions and I can share how Jesus transforms my life. But I am worried about lapsing from teaching to preaching. I heard one brave speaker on the radio say he gave his children permission to call him out if he preached more than 90 seconds--which he noticed was the point at which they stopped listening anyway. I did not need to tell my children. They came equipped with lecture detectors. If I did not notice they were no longer listening, I could not fail to notice the eye rolling, which was so pronounced, I thought they might dislodge an eyeball. (Admittedly, the thought gave me a little pleasure.) But my grandchildren might be more polite than my children, I sincerely hope they are, so I am thinking of making a Lecture Detector Checklist. 

   1. Am I the only one talking? Even if I'm not lecturing, I'm monopolizing the conversation. People who are interested, join in--if I let them.
   2. Am I saying you more than I'm saying me or we? Especially if you is followed by should. It is infinitely better to share how I learned to apply God's Word in my real life situations than how I think they should in theirs theoretically.
   3. Check the body language. Does the other person look bored? at their phone? at the exit? Eyeballs rolling on the floor? Are their arms crossed? (When my husband's arms are crossed, they function like the deflector shields on "Star Trek", I might as well stop talking.)
   4. Am I listening to learn more about them or gather material for my next sermon? I did this to my children and, sometimes, still do to my husband. Also, am I listening just enough to springboard back to what I was saying? (See monopolizing above.)
   5. Am I asking questions to understand their viewpoint or to defend mine? Ouch! (See long suffering husband above.)

    Of course, not lecturing is easy when my grandchildren are two, and yet to be born. "No, no Brie!" is about as long a conversation as she can take in. My wisdom, such as it is, will not benefit them if it is not in a form they can take in. If wisdom from above is spoken in love, it should not set off their Lecture Detectors.