"My Way" Robbery

     When my children were approaching their teens, a time when many second generation Christians become rebellious, I prayed that the Lord would not let that happen to mine. I knew many of my friends were in that situation, but I didn't think I would be able to bear it. One of the things I did not yet understand is that there is no such thing as hypothetical grace. God gives us his grace for the reality of need, not just the possibility. The other thing I did not know was what a huge blessing that troubled time in my son's life would be in mine. The greatest blessings of my spiritual life have come to me through my son's addiction.
     All my Christian life I had longed for an experience like Hagar had in the wilderness when she realized God saw her, knew her struggle and provided help. She named the well He provided Beer-lahai-roi, well of the living God who sees me. My wilderness was at the side of the road on the way to addiction treatment. As soon as my son said, "I will never believe in God because I can't see Him and He can't see me.", a car pulled up behind us, a believer sent by God to encourage us. After decades as a Christian, God settled the matter once and for all, I knew for certain--the living God sees me. And that has been a blessing not only for us, but for the many with whom I have shared that story since.
     When we started this journey through my son's addiction, I told God I needed him to be real, as real as the view from my window and the furniture in my room. And I needed to hear from Him, not generically through His word, but specific guidance for our situation. God answered that prayer by His Spirit's words impressed in my mind. These messages were seldom what I wanted to hear, but they were what I needed to. Even now, after the crisis has passed and our family reaps the benefits of our son's sobriety, the intimate communication between myself and the Spirit continues.
    If God had answered my prayer for stray proof children as I asked, I would have missed the greatest spiritual blessings of my life--our encounter with God, deep intimacy with the Spirit. And all these blessings came to me through my straying son. Blessings I would have robbed myself of if God had done things my way.