Assassination, Assumption, Assignment, Assessment

     After finishing my chapter a day homiletics study of Job, I have moved on to Esther, not just because the book is next to Job (I'm not too lazy to turn pages), but because it is another book where everything seems to be going wrong. Not only wrong, but legislated wrong, fatally wrong. And God is not even mentioned. As in Job, it appears God is taking a long lunch and silenced his phone. Esther is also the most ironic book in the Bible and I love good irony. I am glad God enjoys irony because that gives us something in common. Esther is the perfect mix of just enough said, suspenseful chapter endings, seamless blending of seemingly random events, perfect timing and masterful irony. Today I read chapter 6, my divisions were:
               Assassination, Assumption, Assignment, Assessment.
     In summary, the king can't sleep and asks for his chronicles to be read, either wanting to review how wonderful he was or figuring something dull would lull him to sleep. The random reading included how Mordecai foiled a previous assassination attempt on the king. Realizing his rescuer had been unrewarded, he looks for someone to help honor Mordecai and, who should appear, but Haman. Haman had been coming to ask permission to hang that very person. But when Xerxes asked for honor ideas, helpful Haman's assumption was that he was the honoree. Haman's idea was an honor parade in the king's robes on the king's horse. The king liked what Haman suggested and gave him the assignment of doing that for Mordecai. I would love to have heard his voice proclaiming Mordecai's honored status. Then humiliated Haman leaves the honor parade for a pity party at home. His wife and friend's assessment was that fighting a Jew has brought him nothing but trouble and continuing may ruin him. I wish Israel's current enemies could figure that out.
     But Esther's appeal to my mind would mean nothing if it did not also change my heart. When my son's truck rolled upside down in September, my spiritual life did too. The pickup was totaled and my stability was badly damaged. Since then I have been making a journey. Rolling from:  I don't trust God to I can't fight God (Job's perspective) to I trust God and now to I'm on your side. Though I bring nothing to the table, no talent, no power, no control, I give what is mine to offer--my loyalty. However, this plays out, whether or not my hopes for my son or my own life come true, I choose to stand with God. And I know that only God could give me the power to feel this way, so I am doubly blessed--no, honored.