You Know You're in Adversity

     Your know you're in adversity when:

• You watch a movie about a man marooned on Mars and think--What's HE got to complain about?
• You exercise to slow down your heart rate.
• Your blood pressure registers on a seismograph--in California.
• To cheer up, you watch a horror film.
• A migraine seems like a welcome diversion.
• You go to your happy place and it's a cemetery.
• Having a good day means things went from worse to bad.
• Your brain feels like a balloon that will either pop or come loose and shoot around the room.
• You get your daily affirmation from the obituary page.
• You're rejected as a organ donor because your heart is broken.                        

 
      But that is also when:

• God is near.     Ps. 34:18
• We learn patience.    James 1:3
• We long, as we should, for Christ's appearing.   2 Tim. 4:8
• We grow in humility, knowing that we are dust.      Ps. 103:14
• We live in godly interdependence.      Gal. 6:21
• Faith grows.     1 Jn. 5:4
• Our perseverance builds character and hope.   Rom 5:3,4
• We learn how to comfort others.   2 Cor. 1:4
• God encourages us in unexpected ways.           
• Our testimony is loudest in adversity. No eloquent four-point presentation of the gospel is as compelling as a Christian’s inarticulate gasp when pain and confusion and trust and hope all mix together.  Inexplicable peace amidst adversity, that is the thunder of our faith.

Mastering Maynard

    There are cats and there is Maynard. Maynard is anatomically a cat, but has the personality of a stoner and the spirituality of a zen master. If Maynard wasn't covered by fur, he would be walking around in his underwear, perfectly content, at one with the world. He is not, however, at one with dogs. Slow, harmless dogs like our old Garth or the annoying, inactive dog we wound up giving away, or even Tracy's mellow Malamute pup are okay, but spunky ones like his Husky mix are not. Odin loves everyone, but is terrifyingly enthusiastic in his pursuit of friends. Odin has chased Maynard who, despite being a stoner, has a good memory.  So Maynard won't come around when Odin is visiting and our granddogs visit a lot.  Maynard also avoided our son for years based on cat spinning experiments when they were both younger. We tried to convince Maynard our home was now spin-free, but you can't reason with a cat.
     This created a serious problem two years ago when we were out of town during a subzero weekend and Tracy was housesitting. Maynard refused to come in the house. This should not have a posed a big problem because Maynard is also a two-timer. He has another "mom" two houses down. We discovered this through travel incidents like the one above. When Maynard sauntered in days after our return, well fed and groomed, we knew he was cheating on us. Since there is no "Cheaters" program for cats, we put a collar and tag on him. Sure enough, two days later a neighbor called to find out why we put a collar on the cat she had for two years. We said, "Because we've had Maynard for five." Since you can't confine a free-spirited feline like Maynard to the house, especially since Margo had been feeding him canned food, shared custody was the only option. Margo couldn't let him in because her house cat violently objected, so Mayn hung out on her deck. However, the deck was not warm enough during the aforementioned blizzard and, with the set-in-his-ways habit of a middle aged man, Maynard refused to enter the new shelter she had made for him. She tried to coax him into the box, but you can't reason with a cat. So we did the only thing we could do from hundreds of miles away, we prayed to his Master and ours to keep him safe. He did.
     When we got home, we put a cat door in the garage so the cats could go in and out as they please. Sola, our emergency back-up cat, eventually realized she could use it to get in the house and Maynard learned he could use it to get out, but they were not sharing that knowledge with each other, and both preferred to have their servants/us escort them out in the wee hours. Using the cat door as they pleased meant using our services instead. Tutoring cats by carrying them through the crowded garage and shoving them through the cat door was harder than being their doormen and you can't reason with a cat, so we just had to wait till they learned the door swung both ways.
     That fixed the inclement weather problem, but Maynard still wouldn't come in the house, even while Odin was in the backyard. You know you miss your cat when the thought of him leaving mouse livers or bird parts on someone else's doormat bothers you. We missed our Maynard, but you can't reason with a cat, so we told the one who speaks all languages, human and animal. Maynard came home. He still spends lots of time at Margo's but has discovered there are many Odin free zones in our house. That answered prayer encouraged us for the other "unreasonable" situations in our life. Great or small, creation or creature, we all answer to the same Master. And He answers back.

Hall Pass

     Our current house has a very short hallway, if you could even call it that. Actually, it takes longer to say the word "hallway" than to walk ours. Ours is more like a, "huh" This is no great loss because a hallway is not my favorite part of a house. But there are times I miss having one. Most houses have bathrooms down the hall, whereas ours is across from the stairwell. We placed the back of our piano against the half wall of that same stairwell because of the acoustic benefit. Unfortunately, it has the same effect with the bathroom sounds from across the hall.  Reed and I have the option of using our pretentiously named master bath, which is actually smaller than this font, but nonetheless private.
     Guests, however, would draw more attention to themselves by requesting our private privy than by using the regular one. Maybe. Most of the time, the only thing of notice is the wide variety of bladder capacities. However, one guest had the misfortune of producing a long, flatulent whistle in our chamber of echoes. The rest of us pretended we could not hear, but it is hard to make small talk against a background of intestinal forte. That memory made me self conscious about what noises I may be making when company and nature call at the same time. That is the problem of needing a hall pass, but having no hall.